Four years ago, I went to my first Tony Robbins event and it changed my whole world. I move in a world of coaches, especially females, who don’t necessarily agree with everything Tony has to say, but with that in mind, I had to find out for myself what he is all about… and I don’t regret it for a minute.
Tune in this week as I share with you everything I’ve learned over these past four years about myself and everyone around me. Hear the impact that Tony’s teachings have had on how I approach everything I do. Life is all about experience, growth, and success and we can all learn from the tidbits I have in store for you today.
Welcome to Love Your Living, a podcast for ambitious women who choose to have it all. Learn how to achieve the massive success you’ve been dreaming of in your business and your personal life. Here’s your host, multiple six-figure business owner and a life stylist, Brooke Keeling.
Hey, everyone and welcome to the Love Your Living podcast, where we get real; real in talking about life and ambition and growth and the reality of it. Today, I am going to take you guys behind the scenes of my love for Tony Robbins. And if you’ve followed me at all or listened to any previous podcast, you’ll know that I do have a lot of love for Tony and Sage and their impact that they make and the impact they’ve made on my life.
Now look, what I think is pretty crazy is that I didn’t even know, like really know – I guess maybe I knew who Tony Robbins was, but not until about four years ago did I really get this obsession about what he was doing. And when I first signed up for one of his events, I had a lot of anxiety within me with actually telling people that I was going to one of his events or that I actually did drink the Kool-Aid.
And I’m in a world of females, I’m in a world of coaches that don’t necessarily believe in his practices, for one reason or another. So I had a lot of tension between, like, is this the right thing? Is it all just a hoax? Should I believe in this? Is it for real? All of the things that I think a lot of people think and also question as yell, you know.
You go and you are part of a big experience and you have people around you that also believe in the same thing, but then what happens when you come home into your own world and you start to get negative feedback or you start to have people push their own opinions on you, which you know what, everybody has the right to have their own opinions.
So I’m going to talk a little bit about Tony. I just got back from an event of his called Unleash the Power Within. It’s where it all started for me and I went to the same event, UPW, I think four years ago now in Chicago and he came back around, was in Chicago again a couple of weeks ago. I went with my husband and a team member.
And you know, the thing is, I’ve been to all of his events now and this is the second time I’ve been to this event and you always get something different out of it. And what’s also really interesting is seeing the people around you as well. Like I mentioned, I’ve gone to many of these events and I can go to a lot of them now and there’s thousands of people, and I can see the same people.
A lot of those same people are in his platinum group, they’re there, they’re taking time out of their businesses; their multi-million-dollar businesses. They’re investing in themselves. They bring their kids back, teenagers, kids under 10 years old. I think it’s absolutely incredible.
And they’re playing full-out. You can tell that they believe in it. They’re there, they believe in it, they’re taking time out of their busy schedule, they’re traveling around the world. And then you have people that are in the hallway on their video games. I was sitting next to a family one day and they had two of their teenage sons with them, probably 18, 20, 16, 18, somewhere around there. And you could tell, they were just too cool for this, like way too cool, which spending thousands of dollars to go to an event like this and not play all-out is just mind-boggling to me.
But one of the biggest lessons that I’ve gotten out of this and takeaways that I get when I just watch people and watch how they interact and watch how they go through things is it’s like anything else in life. As human beings, we have these feelings inside of us about what will this person think of me or are they going to think a certain whatever?
And the truth is, it’s not up to them how you experience life. And if you’re willing to let go of that judgment and be there for you and show up in your life for you, you’re going to get so much more out of it. That doesn’t just go for self-development weekend or whatever event or whatever it is. When you show up for yourself in your life, when you show up with an open mind and how can I get something out of this or what can I learn from this or who can I help, or whatever it may be, that’s when you get the real gifts in life.
Spending a few thousand dollars to go and do this for a weekend and sit in your chair and not do shit or have a bad mindset about it or whatever it may be, that’s what life is going to be for you. So regardless, if you’re a Tony fan, if you’re not a Tony fan, I love Tony. I think that he’s an extraordinary human being.
He started with nothing. He started with a struggle, a big struggle in his life, and he’s created an incredible empire for himself, an incredible legacy. And when you look at someone like that, there’s no reason why he has to continue to work. There’s no reason why he has to show up and be on stage for 12 hours, giving it his all. It’s him being extremely passionate and Sage being there for every event, they don’t need to do any of this anymore, but he is relentless in personal growth.
He could have stopped learning and growing decades ago and been extremely wealthy, not have to worry about anything, but he’s still going. He’s still doing it. He’s still showing up. He’s still learning things every day. He was telling a story about how he books all of his self-development events and he still does them. Every single year, he picks a few different events that he goes to, a few trainings, so that he can get better. And he booked one for this past year and it happened two dates switched up on his events and this event and whatnot and he had to go directly from one of his events, his event called Date with Destiny where he plays all-out for seven days and nights and early mornings, all of it.
I’ve been to this. It’s just insane that a human being can do this day in and day out for seven days. But he flew directly from that event to his own self-development event where it was like 14 hours in a dark room measuring brain patterns and scientific whatever. So everybody who came to Date with Destiny who was exhausted and tired and wanting to go home and oh my gosh, I just need to sleep, he went for a whole other seven days after that to an event that was probably two times what his just was after leading that entire thing.
It’s just crazy. It’s mind-boggling to me. And I’m totally not into the long days and that approach that you take and there needs to be more pleasure and more fun in it, I get it. I think that there’s a balance between a lot of those things. And honestly, a lot of the coaches and mentors that I have worked with recently, that is their philosophy; it’s very much creating more pleasure and fun and listening to your body and all of that.
But on Tony’s side of things, he’s trying to rewire your psychology and your internal belief systems and neurological wiring and this is the reason he has reasons for why he does what he does in the order that he does them and why he has people jumping up and down like a rave and screaming and chanting and doing all of these crazy things. It’s not for him. It’s not for his satisfaction. It’s how he studied people his entire life the last 40 years, his entire career and what he has seen his made the biggest impact when they leave that setting to implement into their own life.
So there’s a reason behind the madness. There always is a reason behind the madness. When you show up and you’re open to learning and being open to a different way or a new method or whatever, I think that’s what you’re going to get back out of it as well. But I’ve also learned with any coach that I work with, everybody has what works for them and not one thing works for everyone.
I personally like to mix a lot of different things together that I’ve learned over the years, what works for me, what doesn’t work for me. And I do love Tony and Sage – they have an incredible heart and I think especially for Tony, I’m surrounded in a woman’s world right now and the empowerment for females and the impact that we have the ability to make in our world and our society and for our daughters and the women ahead of us and the life and opportunity, everything, it’s absolutely incredible. It’s amazing.
But the reality behind Tony’s messaging, especially right now and this whole #metoo movement is this victimization, which he’s taught for years and years and years, when you hold on to something in order to gain significance and what that does, it only deprives you of being able to engage and see both sides of things and be able to learn and grow. And rather than being able to step into a place of power, we’re stepping into a place of victimization and gaining strength from a place of weakness, which I am a female and I feel very strongly about this, but I don’t to have handouts.
I don’t want to be scaring people into a certain way. I want equal rights for men and for women; equality, true equality. And there’s nothing more than that, exactly, that Tony wants for everyone and if you’re someone that has just read social media or have gotten triggered by certain things that have been said or whatever, Tony being in the limelight and kind of written him off, I challenge you to actually understand where he’s coming from because I’ve heard him in a couple of different settings in person when things get taken out of context, and especially when you have that much fame and that much power, there’s always going to be a bigger target on your back.
The man has nothing but love for men and for women and that has been his entire career. So anyways, Tony, what about Tony? I drank the Kool-Aid, I drank all of the Kool-Aid the first event I went to and their pitches of selling onto the next thing – look, we’re all in sales. If you get pissed about being sold at an event or whatever, get over your damn self because this is how the world turns. But I bought it all. I don’t regret it. I don’t look back. I spent a lot of money investing in myself and some of these events and I have met incredible people, amazing people. If it was only for the people that I’ve met, all of the time and the money that I have invested in this has been worth every single penny.
I have friends across the world now and what’s even more amazing is that these friends that I’ve met two years ago, three years ago, we keep in touch. They’re doing big things. They are your peer group. They inspire you to do more. You get to know people on such a deep and personal level and seeing all of the successes and seeing them go on in their life and support each other and have this connection is absolutely incredible. It’s amazing.
So UPW, this event that I just went to, is kind of the toe step into the rest of his events and it gives a big perspective. I’m so happy that I went because I got different messages. It’s like reading the same book, right. Like you can have a book that you absolutely love and you can read it three, four, five times over a five-year span and every time you read it, you’re going to get something different out of it, or even a year for that matter.
I used to listen to the Entrepreneur Rollercoaster, I had it on DVD or whatever, before I had them, I had to change out the disks when I got to the end of one of them in my car. This wasn’t even that long ago, which is kind of sad. I’m just so not tech-savvy. But a few years ago, I listened to the Entrepreneur Rollercoaster on repeat and I bet it was probably a year. Every time I got into my car, I spend a lot of time in my car, I listened to the same book and I got so many meanings and messages out of it. But every time I listened to it, I got something different and it’s the same thing with an event like this or whatever you invest in yourself in – if you’re open to receiving them, you’re going to get different messages, especially if you’re on this path of growth and continuing to push yourself. You’re going to be at a different level when you hear some of the same messages.
And so it was really great. I’m going back to Date with Destiny again this December and that was by far my favorite event. I recommend it to anyone and everyone. It was absolutely amazing. It’s intense but it’s amazing. And this was a good little reminder and a good little ramp-up midyear that got me going again.
And so on the first day, Tony talks about energy. And if you’ve followed him at all, you hear him say change your state. You can change your state really fast. He always says how fast and he snaps his fingers, that fast.
So changing your state is really your energy. We have to increase our energy. So energy, low energy, low mindset, low quality of work, your relationships, money. When your energy is low, everything you put out and everything you receive is low. It’s the same content of creating more pleasure in your life, creating more fun, success without fulfillment is the ultimate failure, as he says.
A lot of different coaching systems talk a lot about creating more fun, play – play is like statistically proven, when you have more play, you see more success and it’s because of all of the different chemicals within your brain and allowing yourself the opportunity to just rest. That’s when you grow the most. It’s the same thing with energy. Creating your energy, changing your state, with Tony, he’s like a freaking beast. He can be in the worst place and he’s figured out how to just change his state immediately, what does it for you.
And that’s why you do all this jumping around and music and all of these things, because you realize, you could be in the most depressed state, you put on some good music, you make yourself jump around and dance around, you’re going to get yourself in a different state. Your brainwaves and your heart, breathing patterns, everything starts to change within your body.
Energy and emotion, such powerful tools within us, meaning the meaning of life is emotion and emotion is life. So oftentimes, we think, especially with resources and the lack of resources, whether it be time, whether it be money, whether it be people, whatever it is, the ultimate resource is human emotion. Emotion, it’s your creativity, your commitment, determination, your certainty. You set out to get a goal, you’re certain you’re going to hit it. When you’re in a depressed state, it’s like, oh I kind of hope I get there.
When you’re certain and you keep yourself in a great state and positive momentum, having flexibility, connection, compassion, you see the vision, that’s the energy that you need in order to see this success with all of your big goals. You have the resources, you just need to turn them on. That’s day one; learning how to turn on those resources, learning how to change your state.
Who do you have to become in order to achieve your goals? It’s such a great question. I’ve talked about that many times before; who do you need to become? Who is that person, that person in your mind that you visualize of having already achieved all of your goals, who is she? How does she act? How does she treat herself? How does she treat others? What does her day to day look like? Who do you need to become?
The big takeaway here is that we all bog ourselves down so much with lack of and scarcity and not enough time and stress and overwhelm and in that state, we do not have the energy. We do not have the creativity. We do not have internally what we need in order to push us that much further and faster.
The goal is not to get more, it’s to become more. And the key to happiness is growth. I love this – the key to happiness is growth. When we’re not growing, we’re dying. I truly believe this.
When you set out to hit a goal and you reach that goal, life doesn’t just all of a sudden – that’s it, right? It doesn’t just stop. It’s not just, “Okay I’m fulfilled for the rest of my life.” No, when you set a goal and you achieve that goal, oftentimes for me, I forget to even celebrate that goal, which we need to celebrate our goals more. The more that you celebrate, the more that you receive, the more you have to celebrate.
But the key to happiness is growth; continuous growth, always pushing ourselves through and also understanding that in order to live these extraordinary lives, which I know so many of you are setting out to achieve, the same with me, looking at some of the, what we call failures or hurdles or things that are happening, what we think to us, but it’s actually for us, we have to appreciate those things.
It’s almost a requirement to have those struggles or to have those – it’s not even a struggle, it’s just a gift that’s making your stronger. It’s a worthy opponent, as Tony would say. But you have to have those. It’s almost a requirement in order to have the greatness that you’re setting out to do, to have.
You have to have those breakthroughs. You have to be able to breakthrough something to get to the other side. So learning to welcome those hard times, those are going to make you so strong. They flex your muscle. So emotion, emotion is such a big topic that he covered in the first day and how to change your state. Meaning equals emotion, emotion equals life.
The next big thing that he touched on, which I think that he honestly has taught in almost all of his events it’s that important, but it’s the six human needs. And everybody has the same needs. It’s certainty, uncertainty, significance, love and connection, growth and contribution. What’s interesting is that as a human being, we’re all consistently seeking to meet the six human needs, but we all tend to value two more than the rest.
And what’s fascinating is when we looked at this room of 9000 people, the top emotion and need that the majority of this group was seeking was significance. Human nature, it’s our society right now, everybody wants attention and significance and am I enough, what will they think?
I mean, obviously I can’t get into all of this, but when you know which needs you value the most, you can better understand the choices that you make as well as your emotional patterns as well as what drives other people, what their values are, which especially for me in my life, managing a team, managing a sales business, working with human beings in general, I find that fascinating and it’s really powerful. It’s very powerful.
I remember the first time I did this exercise, significance was within my top two. I don’t remember what my other one was, but I do remember significance being in my top two. And since then, I’ve really changed the way that I’ve gone about my life too. I think even now I’m going into it, it was a very simple question proving the answer what do I value the most, which is love and connection and growth.
The next big thing that Tony talks about which, again, if you’re in the self-development world, if you’ve had a coach, I don’t know of any coach that doesn’t coach on the same topic; it’s just called a different thing. It’s the power of beliefs or your stories or whatever, your internal language. A belief is defined by – it’s a feeling of certainty about what something means to you.
So when Tony talks about beliefs, it’s based on success, which is another reason why I really love Tony, because it’s quality of life but it’s also the successes in your life. So three beliefs for lasting success; it must change now – must, now, you have to take immediate massive action. It’s a big one for Tony. I must change it now. It’s no one else’s fault. It’s no one else’s job. It’s your life. It’s your job. And I can change it now.
And also, remembering that the past does not equal the future unless you live in the past. So he talks also a lot on your internal thermostat, where you live, where your home is, your emotional home, where you go back to, and that’s all on the way you were raised, your childhood, how you were wired and being able to break those patterns and create new beliefs and being able to push past that.
With all of this that I’ve learned, I know that it’s probably like oh my gosh, I don’t even know what she’s talking about, there are so many really great topics just to be able to apply to any human being or any area of your life, whether it be success or business or your family. Whatever it is, happiness is growth, remembering that and knowing also – this is why I love going back to these – is repetition is the mother of all skill.
Knowing is not enough. Knowing this stuff, even taking these little tidbits, yes, it’s great I’m sharing this with you, I hope that you get some insight or some understanding of what Tony’s all about but knowing is not enough. You have to use it, you have to apply it. And in order to do that, you have to study it. You have to go back. You have to immerse yourself back into that place and that state and bring it back. This takes years. It’s been four years since I went to my first event and I’m still learning new things.
I’ll leave you with a couple little tidbits that I have in my notes; takeaways that I’ve starred that I love, things that Tony’s said. One of them, life will pay whatever price you ask of it. Where focus goes, energy flows – I love that one. Condition yourself. Train yourself to be great. It’s not a destination. Always push yourself to your edge. Always play to your edge and remember that you are your rituals, your habit. In order to create a habit – there’s a lot of different studies, 30 days, 60 days, 90 days in order to create a habit, but you have to keep doing it. Repetition is the mother of all skills. You have to keep doing it. You have to train yourself. You have to create great habits.
We don’t get what we want; we get who we think we are. And then, if you follow me on Insta, the Gram, I posted one of my favorite little takeaways which I’ve never seen from him before and I don’t know if it’s something that he’s said before. I’ve never heard it, but if you want security, go to prison; if you want freedom, step up.
I’ll leave you guys with that. I love you all. Thank you so much for tuning in. I hope you got some insight here from Tony. Send me questions. Send me whatever you have. I’m sure I’ll probably have a little bit of uproar here and that’s totally cool. But you know what – the whole purpose of us being here is being able to have connection and us being able to have some of the hard conversations and make the world a better place.
And whatever it is that you believe in, who you believe in, who you follow, who you like, whatever, just find someone that motivates you and inspires you to live great. Don’t be good, be great. Have a great week. I’ll see y’all next week. Thank you so much. And if you guys haven’t, please, please, please go write a review. It will take you two minutes. Go to loveyourlivingonline.com/itunes – you can leave me a quick little note, give us a rating and it will help other people find us just like you. We out…
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